Friday, 25 July 2014

I don't think we're cut out for this!

Today I...
Well today has been tough. Why? Well, yesterday we realised that Poppy's passport didn't have the required 6 months left on it that's needed to go on the cruise we are going on next week. Yes, next week. Dagnammit. It's still in date but I guess if Pops gets thrown in prison for smoking crack again (what is it with 11 year olds nowadays?) then she'd be there locked up without a passport. Or something. That IS a joke btw
So Mr Panda ran around yesterday like a man posessed getting the forms, taking Poppy for photographs in the booth in Tesco in Stow on the Wold (officially the most expensive Tesco in the country - bit of useless info for you there) then he came home, and went out again to buy a BLACK biro (it must be black, if it's not black then everybody dies) and filled in the form to try and get it sent off Special Delivery. But oh no! It needs counter signing by an upstanding pillar of the community! Do we know any? *Frantic scrabbles for upstanding pillar ensues*. All laying down on the grass in the sun. Useless.
Anyway, it didn't happen before the post went so good ol' Mr P has today driven to the passport office in Liverpool. It only took him 5 hours to get there. Bet he wishes he'd fixed the air con now, huh?
I'm left alone. Not technically alone as Kath is here packing parcels, and Sonia our temp-angel (official title) is too...and their children...but my Mr P is gone which means I am *dum dum duuum* fending for myself. With a capital F.
The last time he went away with Poppy I had Monster Munch and soup in a cup for dinner and daren't go outside for my Mr Whippy because I'd never unlocked the front door before. It's not until he leaves me alone that I find out how weirdly dependant I am (and more than a little odd, I know, I know!). It turned out that I did indeed run out for my fix, but had to call Kath back to open the door for me. Rubbish.
But hooray! Pops stayed behind and she showed Kath how to use the coffee machine AND she went to the chippy for lunch so I am, thankfully, still alive and haven't wasted away - although he isn't home yet so there's still time. Pray for me.
Although I am totally crap at life and everything that normal people do every day I CAN cut paper rather well. So I did just that...

"I don't think we're cut out for this!"

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